thetamayn

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50 favoris

Quand on aime, on ne compte pas. Déjà 50 VDM dans vos favoris !

Moralisateur

Vous avez dépassé la barre des 100 votes - tu l'as bien mérité -.

Maître du TLBM

C'était donc votre 500e vote - tu l'as bien mérité -. Nous nous prosternons.

Je valide, ma souris fonctionne

200 votes je valide, c'est une VDM. C'est la base.

Un de plus et c'est le tête à queue

Vous avez obtenu 68 Miaou sur votre profil. Joli !

La liste des badges à trouver

Thetamayn - VDM en favoris

Par Anonymous - 12/04/2013 15:34 - United States

Today, my boyfriend was going down on me. Just as I was about to orgasm, he pulled away and said that my vagina is like a mask and that he feels like Bane from Batman. He's been talking in a Bane voice to my vagina for 30 minutes now. I guess sex is over. FML

Je valide, c'est une VDM 66 540

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Oh, so cute

Par Anonymous - 10/04/2013 04:28 - United States

Today, my boyfriend and I went to the store to buy oranges and pick up a pack of condoms. When we were at the checkout counter, my boyfriend happily told the cashier, "The only way we can have sex is if we squeeze oranges all over our bodies." FML

Je valide, c'est une VDM 58 966

Tu l'as bien mérité 13 222

Par Anonymous - 09/04/2013 18:01 - United States

Today, at work as a gynecologist, I called in my last patient of the day. As soon as I took a peek, I noticed that she had stuck googly-eyes above her vagina. She told me with a straight face not to be afraid, because "She doesn't bite." FML

Je valide, c'est une VDM 53 052

Tu l'as bien mérité 5 410

Almost done

Par Anonymous - 09/04/2013 04:59 - Canada

Today, it's my 17th birthday, and the first birthday since my mother died, leaving me to live with my previously-absent father. He gave me pretzels and a laser pointer, and said, "Happy birthday, fuckstick." One more year… FML

Je valide, c'est une VDM 70 599

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Par creepermagnet - 06/04/2009 19:39 - United States

Today, I went on a date with a guy for the first time. We went to Starbucks and got coffee. We talked for a while, and we were joking and having a good time. Suddenly, he put his hand on my stomach and said, "Soon, this will be plump with my seed." FML

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Tu l'as bien mérité 46 091

creepermagnet nous en dit plus

creepermagnet 0

mardi 7 avril 2009 2:44

Let me tell you the rest of the story: this actually happened a couple months ago, but I just discovered this site. First off, there was NO second date. My God. Right after he said that, I told him I wanted to go home (he had driven, and I didn't have a car or any way to get home). He then asked if I wanted to go to the woods so he could "do things to me." I told him no, going home would be fine. He took me home and I called him and told him I never wanted to see him again. For half an hour, he tried to convince me to see him again, but I eventually just hung up. For a month or so he called me every day but I didn't answer. Finally, I grew tired of this and I answered the phone. I told him he was really scaring me and he needed to stop trying to contact me. He told me, "I was falling in love with you but they all laughed at me!" (Mind you, I do not know who "they" are. Nor do I wish to know). I told him I was very sorry, but he had to stop calling me or I would contact the police. He then said to me, "Where is the darkness??? Why do you paint me as a demon when I just want to show you the light???" I haven't spoken to him since.